I came from a family of severe dysfunction and the things that happened in that family were atrocities to those it happened to. Each of the daughters in this family used different ways to cope. I had one sister that used higher education to get her out of this family plan without too much damage. One sister became the scapegoat in which she caused much dysfunction herself because that was all she saw in this family of ours. One sister was the family clown who made us laugh and feel far removed from the trauma and abuse in this severely dysfunctional family. Then there was myself, I was the lost child.
I am not that lost child anymore and I have a strong voice. I am telling the world that things can and will get better if you are willing to do your part to heal. No one can do this for you. I know it can be daunting but you can succeed.
I for my part compartmentalized my life as a child because of the great amount of incest. I was sexually abused by my mother, my Grandfather, my sister, my father, my uncle, a cousin, my step father and there was Satanic abuse in which my father was the instigator. I learned how to retreat into my mind and create many alters that helped to survive my childhood into my adulthood with my super abusive husbands. I kept marrying men who reminded me of my father who was a bad abuser because that was all I knew.
It was not until I left my first husband that I started to realize I had created 57 alters to cope with severe and prolonged abuse and trauma that began at age one and went thorough my adult years as a wife to two men. Then my wonderful journey began! I have so much more to tell you about but time is growing short and I must go! Take that first step into freedom!
My senses are awakened when I am by the ocean.